PORTSMOUTH — It all began with a misunderstanding.
Officer Jeff Cornelisse, in his seventh year on the Portsmouth police force, was called to a Bramans Lane home. A bus driver had reported seeing an abused child on the ground outside.
When he arrived, Officer Cornelisse, 28, found a young girl all curled up in a fetal position.
It was Lily, a 13-year-old with cerebral palsy.
“She was outside playing and the bus driver thought she was being abused and left there, and in fact she wasn’t,” said Jeff.
Lily was at the home of her respite provider, Jennifer Trotter, who cares for her while her mom, Beth Nilson of Middletown, is at work.
“Lily sits down on the grass and scoots,” explained Jennifer, who’s taken care of Lily for more than three years and has her six days a week. “She can’t walk or anything. When she doesn’t know somebody, she tucks her head in like a turtle.”
![Beth Nilson, her daughter Lily and Officer Jeff Cornelisse visit at the Portsmouth police station recently.]()
Beth Nilson, her daughter Lily and Officer Jeff Cornelisse visit at the Portsmouth police station recently.
To her amazement, however, Lily warmed up to Jeff right away.
“Lily doesn’t go to many men,” said Jennifer. “She goes to her mom’s fiancé, my husband and her dad. It took her a long time to get used to me and my husband, but she climbed right up on Jeff. She was hugging him and she turned around and sat exactly like him.”
Jeff said he’s not sure why Lily accepted him so quickly, but that his police training may have been a factor.
“What happened that day was that Jennifer introduced me to her and I was always taught that a solid tactic is to always get on someone’s level — to never be above somebody else,” said Jeff. “Especially with kids, you can’t be afraid to get your uniform dirty and to get on the ground with them. I just talked to her like she was a person and she came right over. She feels everything out; a lot of her sensory is touch. She came over and started touching my hand and slowly climbed on me and gave me a hug.”
“It was just unbelievable,” added Jennifer.
After their chance encounter, Jeff and Lily became fast friends.
“When he came out he spent time with her and he still sees her,” said Jennifer, pointing out that Jeff, who’s married, doesn’t even have children of his own yet. “He also sends texts and e-mails. She knows who he is. I’ve been taking care of disabled people my whole life, and I’ve never seen somebody do what he did. He’s an incredible man — just a good guy.”
![Lily, who’s had cerebral palsy since she was an infant, shows off her dress.]()
Lily, who’s had cerebral palsy since she was an infant, shows off her dress.
Born healthy
Lily was not born with cerebral palsy, according to her mom.
“She was born healthy, then when she was about 10 days old she got some kind of a known virus that caused encephalitis that put her in a coma. The aftereffects caused brain damage which caused cerebral palsy and developmental delays,” said Beth.
Lily is in the seventh grade at Gaudet School in Middletown — “She’s very well-known; everybody likes her,” said Jennifer — and enjoys many of the same things as other kids do.
“She likes to swim, she loves the beach and she loves rocking,” said Beth, adding that Lily uses the pool at the Navy base. “Being in the military we’ve moved around a lot, but she took horse riding lessons for years.”
(The family is relocating again to North Carolina next year. Jeff said he’ll miss Lily dearly and even joked about finding a police officer’s job in the area.)
Recently, Jeff stopped by the Trotter home to give Lily a stuffed horse. “She likes horses and goes down the street to a farm that has horses in the summertime,” said Jeff, who also takes time with Lily when she comes to visit him at the police station.
Taking time, asking questions
The mistake made by the bus driver is a common one. Jennifer knows all too well the basic lack of understanding many people have regarding those with disabilities. Her sister, Jessica, also had cerebral palsy. She passed away at the age of 25 on the day after Christmas in 2008.
“I remember going to church and us being thrown out because my sister would make gagging noises because she had reflux,” said Jennifer.
As a consequence, her parents didn’t take Jessica out in public too often.
“But Beth takes Lily everywhere. She does everything,” Jennifer said. “When I see people stare at Lily, I just say, ‘Honey, you can come up and touch her. Come say hi to her.’ But a lot of people don’t understand. They just think, ‘Ew.’”
![Lily plays with Officer Jeff Cornelisse during a visit to the home of Jennifer Trotter, a respite nurse who cares for Lily.]()
Lily plays with Officer Jeff Cornelisse during a visit to the home of Jennifer Trotter, a respite provider who cares for Lily.
But things have gotten better in recent years, said Beth.
“I think the schools are doing a better job of educating the kids nowadays through programs like Best Buddies, where they pair up kids with the special needs kids to play basketball or special events. Kids these days are probably more open and understanding about it,” she said.
And obviously, so is Jeff, whose instant connection with Lily has touched both women’s hearts.
Jeff said his unexpected friendship with Lily has benefited him as well.
“You’ve got to be able to take time out of your day to meet new people and learn,” he said. “If you don’t know something about it, instead of being shy and not asking, ask about it. What’s the worse that can happen? Two great people and a great little girl can change your life, just like that.”